You Gonna Eat That?
New Car Smell
New Puppy Smell
Gimme Good Livin'
Needs A New Pair Of Shoes
That A Dragon On Your Thigh?
This Job And...
May Already Be A Winner
Xi Fa Cai!
HEY LOOK, IT'S
FTWGIt's all about new beginnings, a new president (no
groaning, please), new digs, new shoes, a new you, newness overall. Sound
good? Of course it does. That's our theme and we're sticking to it. Shall
we begin, then?
GO.com readers! Sushi fans! Sundry middle managers! It's a new month,
a new year, you might be wearing a new pair of socks, and hence here's
a brand-new issue of "From the Word GO," GO.com's deliriously wry monthly
newsletter, back again with more links and invaluable Net tools than you
can shake a New Year's kazoo at, all peppered like a juicy hormone-free steak with cool ads you don't
have to click but we hope you do because they're really good and that's
the only way yours truly, Buzz Daley, gets to keep churning out
these linkalicious gems every month, at least until he finds a rich European
patron to cater to his every whim and polish his fine Prada boots with
imported Russian mink oil. But that's another newsletter.
YOU GONNA EAT THAT?: No more meatball subs! No more cold pizza at
3 a.m.! No more creamed herring milkshakes! Yessir, Buzz knows his New
Year's resolutions as well as anyone when it comes to that most glorious
of human needs, food. From now on, it's tofu and brown rice and Brussels
sprouts galore, I swear. Or maybe I should just dig into a page full of
low-fat recipes, or another crammed like a sausage
calzone with healthy dieting advice? Bring on the broccoli in 2001,
NEW CAR SMELL: Finally ready to junk that old AMC Pacer? Hankerin'
for one of those sweet little bad-boy Chrysler PT Cruisers? Worried about dealers raking
you on the price? Solution: Do your homework before buying. Our guide is your one-stop shop to get detailed
data and reviews, insurance info, price quotes and more about all makes
and models, even those brutish Hummers, which have to be the ugliest vehicle
ever and should probably be banned for being so bloated and pollutive
and annoying. Just an opinion. Gotta love those delicious little Audi TTs, though.
NEW PUPPY SMELL: If there's one thing Buzz Daley wants more than anything
else in this world it's a new chocolate Labrador puppy, maybe a Dobie or
a Razorback, a sweet little bundle o' fur that'll eventually grow strong and loping with a big lolling tongue, a
happycute dog with which I can play fetch all day in the park with one of
those big rubber Kong things. Alas, Buzz Daley's landlord
frowns on pets. Buzz Daley's landlord sucks Milk Bones. But at least I can
read about puppy training, breeds, and of course cats, birds, snakes, and
a whole farm's worth of other domestic animals. Remember to spay or neuter, good people.
GIMME GIMME GOOD
I know, I know. It's real estate. How exciting could it be? Well hey,
it's the new year, a new millennium -- maybe it's time for a new pad?
Shake up your housing universe! New décor? New couch? New set of spatulas? Why not? Out with the old,
in with the new, Buzz always says. But then again I live in a city where
the housing market is meaner'na feral cat in heat and real estate is basically
a religion. Or a cult. Hard to tell. From building your own house to home improvement, renting, leasing, neighborhood guides,
and the ever-popular "lots more."
DADDY NEEDS A NEW PAIR OF SHOES: So you've finally
decided to get the tongue stud and the leather chaps and wear only Versace
mesh T-shirts and stiletto boots and walk the world like you're forever
on a catwalk. Clearly, you are very weird. For the rest of us fashion-forward
folk, it's a whole panoply of designers, models, fads, hair, jewelry,
and even fashion history. Ready for a new look? Bring it on.
IS THAT A DRAGON ON YOUR THIGH?: When the going
gets rough, the rough get inked. Then again, nothing says "Bring on the
new year" better than a nice dollop of ink injected straight into your
skin, permanently, maybe a swell dragon or a flaming skull or picture
of your favorite Backstreet Boy. We're talkin' tattoos, and we've got a great page for them too. (Buzz's advice:
Avoid designs from the wall of most tattoo shops. Check the artist's portfolio,
get something unique -- like a picture of a fierce half-naked Amazonian
forest queen riding on the back of a giant wild boar. Or something.)
TAKE THIS JOB AND...: So you've got the new Montana
ranch and the new lemon-yellow Ferrari and the sexy new tattoo and
now of course it's time to march straight into your boss's office, strip
to your underwear, sing 'Taps' at the top of your lungs, and saunter boldly
out of that miserable cubicle farm and head to greener pastures. (Unless
of course you're happy at your job, in which case we apologize to your
boss and take it all back). It's the jobs page, on GO.com.
What does the new year hold? Will you find love/money/success/a decent
burrito in this crazy convoluted world? GO.com's wildly popular Horoscopes know all, see all, tell
all. And btw, Buzz Daley himself is a Capricorn. He prefers rockin' silver
jewelry, Armani underwear, and cases of Grand Marnier as birthday gifts. In case you were, y'know, curious.
YOU MAY ALREADY BE A
As far as Buzz is concerned, you're already a big
juicy winner because you've read this far and you're still hangin' and I
love you for it, honest. But I gotta plug a coupla GO.com contests
because, well, I have no shame and the marketing department is giving me
that look again:
Actually Cool Contest # 1: Win a seat on
Bill Maher's wry ABC TV show, "Politically Incorrect." Be a guest
panelist! Rant about the state of the world! Meet some partially famous
people! You'll love it. Probably.
Possibly Cool Contest # 2: It's something
to do with "Who Wants to Be a Millionaire", because goodness knows
we don't get enough of that show these days. It's called the "Millionaire
HotSeat Draw3", and if you're a fan, you'll dig it for sure.
Easy Contest # 3: How about entering to
win a 5-day ski vacation for two to Killington, VT?
You have opinions, we have e-operators standing by. Write to Buzz and
the GO.com gang at (Buzz_Daley@go.com), let us know how
much you love FTWG and can't wait for the next issue. All negative comments
will be taken very seriously and then immediately deleted so we don't
get all depressed. Or visit the Buzz Daley message board at GO.com, and let us
know what you think (Hint: Chocolate chip cookie recipes and sundry marriage
proposals take top priority.)
You are receiving this brilliant and tender e-mail because you registered
with GO.com awhile back, and also because we think you're really really
special and would love to meet you someday for dinner and maybe a movie.
If for some unknowable reason you do not want to receive our joyous e-mails
in the future, just click here to unsubscribe. If your friends want
to subscribe (yes yes yes!) just tell 'em to register here.
for the state of the universe as it exists at this point in time. No one
ever remembers to drink enough water. Prefab teenybopper boy bands are a
sure sign of the apocalypse. Don't even think of parking here.
All contents (c) (tm) 2001 GO.com. Any similarities to any persons living
or dead are purely strange. No goldfish were harmed in the creation of
this newsletter, so far as you know.
||Spotlight: Voice E-mail Alert!
|It's the GO.com Voice E-mail Alert! Have:|
|alert you when new e-mail arrives in your GO.com e-mail account.
Seriously. You have been warned. Just click the speaker icon
next to "Send Mail on GO.com" on the GO home page. Buzz has Donald Duck
quacking at him.
|Voice E-mail Alert
||Buzz's Net Tip of the Month
|Make GO.com your home on the
Web - using MS Internet Explorer, just go to the Tools menu and choose
Internet Options. The General tab pops up to show you your current
home page, and gives you the option of typing in a new one. Hey, how
about GO.com? Perfect.|
Bonus tip: Never use your computer's mouse as a
coffee stirrer, flyswatter, or suppository. Trust me.
||More Select Clickables |
It's (still) that time of year, when a young man's fancy turns to
deep powder and bitchin' snowboards and snow bunnies galore.
That's if you're like, 16. For the rest of us, it's ski conditions,
travel deals, family tips, and snow reports from all over the world.
HAPPY 4698th NEW YEAR!:
Whip out the sweet rice cake, light off some firecrackers (where legal,
of course), find your Chinese astrological sign -- it's Chinese New
Year, the Year of the Golden Snake, falling this year on January 24,
2001. Gong Xi Fa Cai! ("Congratulations! You will
What's the big brouhaha about this red-hot digital music format?
How do you download your fave songs and start splashing in the murky
pool of potential copyright infringement and get
the drummer from Metallica really upset? And what's a Napster anyway?
From ripping to encoding to downloading, it's all MP3, all the time, right here.